Author Chuck Swindoll tells about a man who went to see a psychiatrist because he was extremely stressed. The psychiatrist just could not give him any specific advice, because his problems were endless. So he said to the man, “Tonight I want you to go to the circus in town because they have a clown named the Great Rinaldi, he is the funniest clown I have ever seen. Whenever I go to see the Great Rinaldi he always lifts my spirits and feel relaxed.” The man responded. “You don’t understand doctor, I am the Great Rinaldi."
No one is immune to stress. Stress is no respecter or persons. Whether it is a burdensome responsibility, or a difficult marriage, whether it is joblessness, or a deep loneliness, whether it is a painful sickness or grief of separation, each of us has faced stress one way or other, or will face some or all of these. Even the little baby born in to this world is stressed out. We live in a stressful world, turbulent with challenges and troubles on our path of life.
People practice use many means like stretching, exercising, yoga and meditation. Squeezing Stress balls have been around for a long time. There is a new toy in the market called "fidget" toys. Amazon rankings: a recent search revealed that forty-nine of the fifty best-selling toys were either fidget spinners or fidget cubes. Another report claims that the rise in need of the fidget spinner, might mean a lot in the age of covid.
When I call customer support phone line, the message I hear stresses me out: “No one is available to answer your call now, please wait for the next available representative.” To be patient in situations where I have no control becuase frustration and impatience can block me in reaching my objectives. On the other hand, in getting impatient and giving up, we may waste our opportunities. We must learn to how to live productively live with stress or else, we will be pulled apart in pieces.
In Genesis 15, we see The Eleazer alternative. Abraham was asking God, “I dont have any children. Is Eleazer going to be the descendant you are talking about?” Abram’s understanding of God’s plan was limited to his perception about it. In Chapter 16, Sarai comes up with another plan, that she thought was going to be a workable plan since she concluded that she would not be able to bear children any more. The plan of Sarai to have Hagar as a child bearing mother for Abraham ended in what I call the' Ishmael predicament.' Eventhough it was a common and accepted practice in that day, their decision was not the right solution.
A great educator and author William Jones pointed out that about 85% of our suffering is self-induced.
We have heard that “God helps those who help themselves.” It does not work if we take God out of the pictur. You notice that God is strangely absent from the first six verses of chapter of Genesis 16. Hagar was undoubtedly part of what Abram received during his time in Egypt (Genesis 12:16). Abram and family migrated to Egypt for some time due to a famine. Abram was blessed while in Egypt but he had to face consequences of his actions. He returned with a lot of weatlth along with several servants form Egypt. These have huge and far reaching consequences!! Because of Egypt trip that Hagar, Ishmael, and some Arab nations became part of Abram's history.
Many people believe that Sarai was trying to figure out whose medical issue was the reason for the infertility. Sarai knew the promise of God (that Abram would be the father of many nations), yet she thought she was the problem with God’s promise being fulfilled. Sarai probably wanted to do a medical test - to find out if Abraham or Sarai had the issue. Then the worst thing from Sarai’s perspective happened - it succeeded. We let lesser “goods” eclipse our acceptance of the everlasting goodness of God in our lives. The fleeting nature of lesser goods will ultimately disappoint us. Many churches are 'helping out' God by various means. Only Holy Spirit can convict people of sins. You see great revival campaigns no results and large church memberships with no doctrinal basis. Apparent success does not mean it is God’s will. Sarai had a plan, but it was not God’s plan. Eve had a plan in the garden of Eden too!
Now the servant girl Hagar started despising Sarah who in turn treats her harshly. The situation became so bad that Hagar had to run away while she was carrying the baby. Sarai blamed the whole situation on Abram. When our plans go wrong, we get angry at ourselves, angry at others and angry at God. Rightfully, a leader has the accountability and responsibility for every decision. Abram seemed to make a bad situation worse by turning the situation over to Sarai. We have accountability, ultimately to family, to society and to God. We have responsibility - to raise family, care for children etc. Responsibility may be bestowed, but accountability must be taken on. Accountability assumes ownership to make sure the result is accomplished. It is a personal choice to rise above one’s circumstances and demonstrate the ownership necessary for achieving desired results to: "See It, Own It, Solve It, and Do It.” You can be given or bestowed responsibility by someone. But you can only assume accountability.
When we don't step up, but pass on responsibilities, terribly complicated and difficult situations often arise. "Oh what a tangled web we weave", said the poet Walter SCott.
We get trapped by our own nets.
Hagar was trying to solve the problem by running away. Jonah ran away from his problem but found out the hard way that God's plan was better. David wished he could run away in Psalm 55:6, "Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest." God asks Hagar her to return to Sarai. We can suppose that Hagar might have received very different counseling from many counselors today (divorce counsellors and attorneys). God’s plan is to restore and not to destroy. There is danger in running ahead of God.
Although Abraham may have faltered on occasions throughout his life’s journey he continued to trust in God and demonstrated this by his actions, and despite his faults God was pleased to call him 'friend' (James 2:23). Ishmael would become the father of all the Arabic people. Muslims believe that Ishmael was the firstborn of Abraham. They also believe that Muhammad was the descendant of Ishmael. Once grown, Ishmael, according to the Bible, (Genesis 21:21) married an Egyptian woman. But the Arabs say he also married a daughter of Sheik Mudad, who bore Adnan, the ancestor of Mohammed, the founder of Islam. In the book of Galatians (4:21–31), Paul uses the incident to symbolize the relationship between Judaism and Christianity. Hagar is associated with the Sinai covenant, while Sarah is associated with the covenant of grace into which her son Isaac enters.
Hebrews 10:36 says, "Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that He has promised." It is not a change of climate we need, but a change of heart. “Abraham, the father for us all, who against hope believed in hope that he might become the father of many nations.” (Romans 4:18). John MacArthur, in his commentary on this passage, says it this way: “No matter what our situation, our suffering, our pain, our lack of faith in those things, as well as in all other things may be, our heavenly Father will work to produce our ultimate victory and blessing. Any temporary harm we may suffer will be used by God for our benefit.” Bad things, by themselves may not produce good results. But by God’s will and His working, even the most painful ones will work together for our good. Ordinary table salt, for example, is composed of two poisons, Sodium and Chlorine. But when combined together we have Sodium Chloride, the great table salt that gives taste to our food.
A mother's testimony I received is shared here: "When my baby was thrown out of a car during a violent car crash, she spent a year in coma. The doctors tried to get me to pull her plug and end her life. I was finally so distraught that I almost pulled her plug and my plug as well. Finally, even though I didn't want to, I gave my daughter up to God. I gave Him the circumstance she was in -- blind, on life support, unable to speak. When I did, He did not heal her, instead, he gradually began to heal my heart. It took a lot of time. Now, 15 years later, my daughter is still terribly disabled, but both our hearts are healed. My daughter is joyful she is alive. And so am I. That can happen for you too. Someday you will be reunited with the ones you may have lost, the circumstances that hurt you will be changed, the sun will come out, the flowers will bloom, and you will smile.”
Sometimes waiting is meant to heal us than the getting the results. Our hearts and souls will be healed when we wait on our prayers. God has a better plan than ours. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11). God is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can ask or imagine. (Ephesians 3:20). Hope is not a one time thing but is a long term investment. In Psalm 25:5 David says, "my hope is in you all day long." "Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful" (Heb. 10:23). God’s timing seldom matches our expectations. "Blessed are all who wait for him” (Isaiah 30:18).
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28)
Someone said, “most of our stresses are about wanting something that we do not have or about having something we do not want.” Abram and Sarai wanted a child, when they did not have one. That was stressing them and their faith for a long time. So they deviced a plan to have a baby through another woman. There were issues between Sarai and Hagar that added to the stress. Ishmael was born in Hagar. Later on Sarai now renamed Sarah who gave birth to the promised son Isaac. Now they have two sons to deal with and the stress multiplied when the two sons could not get along. Is there an end to the stress in life? It seems like stress multiplies as we handle them. The way the story of the expulsion or, we might say, deportation of Hagar and Ishmael is usually depicted in art and common storytelling, we may have the impression Ishmael was a young child (perhaps not much more than a toddler) at the time. The time lines in Genesis, however, tell a different tale. In Genesis 16:16, we read “Abram was 86 years old when Hagar bore him Ishmael." Genesis 17:24 notes Abraham (renamed at his circumcision) was 99 when he was circumcised, and the next verse tells us that Ishmael was 13 years old at that time. Finally, the birth of Isaac took place when Abraham was 100 years old (Genesis 21:5), which puts Ishmael at 14 years old. The deportation, however, happened only after Isaac was weaned. The expected age of weaning in this culture during this time period appears to have been two to three years old (see I Samuel 1:20-24), meaning Ishmael was likely 16 or 17 years old at the time of his deportation.
Finding short cuts to address a problem worsens it. (Abraham ans Sarah learned)
Abraham was 75 years old when he started on a journey to followed God's promise of a promised land. They travelled in the desert for over 10 or more years, and Sarah did not have a child yet, and she came up with a plan. Sarah gave Hagar, the servant girl as his wife to have a child, and Ishmael was born. He would be about 86 years old. Abraham thought that things would become easy for them now. "What a tangled web we weave?" The more we try short cuts, the more tangled wen we get. Now we see Abraham, Sarah, Hagar and the boy Ishmail are all tangled in a web. All of them are stressed out, even more so for Abraham.
But if we look deeper into the story, this story is not about Hagar. But it was about Ismail, his own son. Knowing Abraham, a caring, peace loving, and God fearing man, he would not send her away empty and poor. Rather than treating her as a slave, he gave her the option of freedom to do what she would like. Freedom comes with responsibility to choose. We find that Hagar had the freedom to do what ever and go wherever. "Early the next morning Abraham took some food and a skin of water and gave them to Hagar. He set them on her shoulders and then sent her off with the boy. Hagar went away with the boy and and wandered in the desert of Beersheba. (Gen 21:14). Hagar wanted to stick it out and do nothing. She has done this before. If you look at Chapter 16, when she was pregnant, and Sarah mistreated her, she ran away to the desert. I wonder if she chose not to pursue productive options, rather she chose to run away from her problems.
Physically running away is a commonly used option. Some people will move to another location thinking their problems will be left behind. Others will jump from job to job in an attempt to find a company that isn't filled with bad people . A third approach is frequently changing relationships in search of a situation that doesn't have any problems. We all know people who have divorced and married 3,4 and 5 times. Problems are often caused by how you act and who you are. Therefore, they will follow you wherever you go. There are some problems that may be solved by changing your location. But if you find that you encounter similar problems wherever you go, running is obviously not the answer. Problems will follow you until you deal with them. There are those who turn to destructive behavior in the quest to run away from their problems. Whether it be drugs, alcohol, reckless gambling, inappropriate friendship or any other type of self-destructive behavior, a new set of issues is created. In addition to their original problems, they have dug a deeper hole for themselves. These individuals may even claim that they will stop their destructive behavior once their problems go away. Their problems won't fix themselves and will get worse and lead to death and destruction. Hagar wished she and the boy could die in the desert. Many of us have wished, if we could run away. David, when faced with stressful situation says in Psalm 55: 6, "Oh that I had the wings of dove, I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert." But God knows where you are and what you are dealing with. Some problems are too much to handle and should be turned over to God. Some problems are big and beyond us. But God is still bigger. We need to turn them over to God. Just like in the case of Abraham, Hagar was also distressed over the plight of her son. The story is a telling story of God’s grace to all and that it is infinite and matchless. It suggests that God is not only concerned with the chosen people of Abraham's descendants. God's initial statement of the promise, was that in Abraham "all the families of the earth shall be blessed," (Genesis 12:3b). The promise comes through Isaac, but there is blessing enough for all! Preaching on this event where Abraham was seen as a very smart when making decisions and portrayed like a mean ol reich man is stressful. It is very hard for me to consider Abraham as stupid and mean. "Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness.' And he was called the friend of God." (James 2:23). He is commented as father of all those who believe (Gal. 3:16-29; Rom. 4:11). God comes to Abraham to assure him that his son will be protected and that Ishmael’s offspring will be counted among Abraham’s heirs. Like Isaac, Ishmael will become a “nation” in accordance with God’s promise. The “Ishmaelites” became traders. They were a nomadic tribe that thrived in the southern deserts, and their lineage continues to this day in the form of the Arab people. Ishmael is honored by Muslims all over the world as the forebearer of the Arab nation and a child of divine promise. The God appears to Abraham, and says, “Do not be distressed about this situation.” Sometimes we think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. We seem to think that others are not having problems. If we get what that person has, then the problem will be solved. The reality is that everybody is under stress, but may be with a different problem. All people everywhere have challenges, heartaches, and burdens to bear. In Psalm 23, David sings, "I will fear no evil", he doesn’t say that I will meet no evil. The question is how do we respond when we walk through the valley. Endurance is not enough. The Bible teaches us a way to make victory out of stress by redeeming stress. Make the stress work for us, not against us. A way to Redeeming stress is to acknowledge and not to be afraid of them. God appears to Abraham, and said, “Do not be distressed.” Someone said, the fear of trouble is more crushing than the trouble itself. God appeared to Hagar, and said the same thing “Do not be afraid” 21:17 Jesus said to the troubled many times, “Do not be afraid” We need to have the faith to see above ourselves in stressful times and not panic. As David says, "I will fear no evil, because God is with me."
Some of our stress can be used for good. I would never get around to preparing a sermon if I were never 'under stress'. I would put it off. The stress is a friend to me. We can use stressful moments to work for us. You see that in many politicians. When they face any embarrassing or shocking questions from the press they use it as an analogy. When a heckler threw a tomato at a candidate in a major election meeting, the candidate responded, "now we can talk about agriculture." and continued his speech. That followed a standing ovation. Ultimately Our stresses must be trusted to God. When stressed out, entrust the matter to God. Jesus said, Matt 6 "Do Not Be Anxious - “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you you will wear. My Father in heaven will provide according your needs" Paul affirms that in Phil 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but pray to God with thanksgiving, sot that the peace of God fill your hearts and minds." A good friend who lost her husband of 30 plus years was in tears when she talked to me. She was hurt as she cannot think of a life without him. He supported her all her known life, and he is gone never to return. I was trying to find the right words to comfort her. We talked about how faith does not exempt us from problems, but God gives us the strength to keep on. Then she wiped her tears, and said, " Sometimes, we just have to walk through the pain, but God walks with us and He is Great." I said, wow, I wish I had said that because it is so true. Chrisitans do not walk alone. All powerful God, the omnipotent and all knowing God, the Omniscient is your companion. He will take care of you. Yes there is life in the stress, through the stress and life will continue after the stress. There is a children’s song:
"My God is so big, And so strong, And so mighty
There's nothing my God cannot do
He parted the sea, He helped a boy To bring a giant right down.
Joshua marched The walls fell to the ground.
But if you want to question My God and His ways I'll look you in the eye and say: Yes, My God is so big
And so strong And so mighty There's nothing my God cannot do.”
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